How to Choose a Therapist as a Neurodivergent Person

H. Oliver
Feb 13
4 min read

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Choosing the right therapist is an important step toward managing mental health and improving overall well-being. However, for neurodivergent individuals, the process can be especially tricky. Neurodivergence includes conditions like ADHD, autism, dyslexia, and other neurological differences, and finding a therapist who understands and can support these experiences is essential. Here’s how to choose a therapist who is right for you as a neurodivergent person:

1. Look for Specialization in Neurodivergence

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Not all therapists are familiar with neurodivergence, so it's crucial to find one who has experience working with neurodivergent clients. You might want to search for a therapist who specializes in ADHD, autism spectrum disorder (ASD), or other related conditions. Many therapists list their specialties in their bios or on their websites, so look for terms like "neurodiversity-affirming," "ADHD," "autism," or "executive functioning."

2. Ensure They Understand Your Specific Needs

While a therapist may specialize in neurodivergence, each neurodivergent individual has unique needs. Some neurodivergent individuals may struggle with sensory sensitivities, executive functioning challenges, or emotional regulation. It's important to find a therapist who is willing to listen to your personal experiences and adapt their approach accordingly. You might want to ask them directly about their experience working with specific challenges you face, such as sensory overload, emotional dysregulation, or communication difficulties.

3. Assess Their Approach to Therapy

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Therapists use a variety of therapeutic approaches. When searching for a therapist, it’s helpful to understand which approaches align with your needs. For example:

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is commonly used for managing ADHD and anxiety, focusing on identifying and changing unhelpful thoughts and behaviors.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is effective for promoting psychological flexibility and aligning actions with personal values, which may be helpful for managing the struggles that come with neurodivergence.
Sensory Integration Therapy can help individuals with sensory sensitivities navigate overwhelming environments or experiences.
Social Skills Training might be beneficial for individuals on the autism spectrum who wish to develop or refine social communication skills.

When interviewing potential therapists, ask about their familiarity with these approaches and how they might use them to support your specific neurodivergent traits.

4. Check Their Experience with Your Age Group

Therapists may have experience working with different age groups, such as children, adolescents, or adults. Make sure the therapist you choose is experienced in your particular age range. For instance, if you are an adult seeking therapy for ADHD, you’ll want someone who understands how ADHD symptoms manifest in adulthood (such as time management struggles, impulsivity, or difficulty focusing at work).

5. Consider Communication Style

The way a therapist communicates can make a big difference in how comfortable you feel during sessions. Neurodivergent people often have different communication preferences, so it’s important to find a therapist who matches your style. Some individuals prefer direct, clear communication, while others might need a slower, more patient approach. Consider whether the therapist is willing to adjust their communication style to suit your needs and ensure a productive relationship.

During your first meeting, pay attention to how the therapist communicates. Are they willing to give you space to explain things in your own terms? Do they seem open to your feedback and adjust their approach accordingly?

6. Look for a Therapist Who is Open-Minded

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Neurodivergent individuals often have unique ways of perceiving and navigating the world. It’s important to find a therapist who approaches neurodivergence with an open mind and does not pathologize or stigmatize your experience. A good therapist will view your neurodivergence as a part of who you are, rather than something to be “fixed.” They should be open to learning from you about how your specific neurodivergence manifests and how they can best support you in your journey.

7. Ask About Treatment Goals and Expectations

Therapists will likely have their own treatment goals for you, but it’s important to understand their approach and ensure it aligns with your own goals for therapy. For example, if you’re seeking therapy for ADHD, you may want help managing focus, impulse control, and executive function. If you're autistic, you might want to work on social communication, coping with sensory issues, or managing anxiety.

Be upfront about what you hope to achieve in therapy and ask the therapist how they plan to help you meet those goals. A good therapist will collaborate with you on setting achievable, personalized treatment goals.

8. Check for Compatibility

The relationship between a therapist and client is central to success in therapy. It’s important to choose someone with whom you feel comfortable and supported. If you don’t feel like the therapist is a good match, don’t be afraid to keep looking. It’s okay to have a few trial sessions to see if the therapist’s approach works for you.

9. Research Your Insurance Options

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Therapy can be expensive, and finding a therapist who is within your budget is crucial. Before scheduling sessions, check with your insurance provider to ensure that the therapist is in-network and covered by your plan. If you’re paying out of pocket, inquire about sliding scale fees or payment plans that can make therapy more affordable.

10. Trust Your Instincts

Above all, trust your gut feelings about a therapist. Your comfort level with the therapist and their approach is key to a successful therapeutic relationship. If you feel heard, understood, and respected, that’s a good sign. If something doesn’t feel right or you don’t feel like you’re making progress, don’t hesitate to find someone else.

Final Thoughts on How To Choose a Therapist

Finding the right therapist as a neurodivergent person can take time and effort, but it’s worth it for your mental health journey. Look for someone who specializes in neurodivergence, communicates well with you, and understands your unique challenges and strengths. The right therapist can help you navigate the complexities of neurodivergence, provide support, and work alongside you to improve your quality of life. Remember, your needs are valid, and finding a therapist who can meet those needs is a critical step in taking control of your mental health.